My SCMP articles on marriage as well as other topics.
Find out what psychologists have to say about relationship issues
- Relationship Inventory
- Unhealthy Signs in Relationships
- Positive Relationship Ground Rules
- Healthy Relationship Habits
- Do You Need a Relationship Contract?
- Stopping Negative Patterns
- Creating Positive Change
If you grapple with any of the following situations, it will be a good idea to talk to a professional about what’s going on/wrong, how to stop the old cycle, and begin a new one.
Some of these Self-Help Checklists might help you understand your relationship better.
Do I leave, or do I stay?
Are you on an emotional roller-coaster with your partner? Do you alternate between fights and making-ups, cold-wars and attempts to reconcile? Wavering between calling it quits and staying? Wondering what’s keeping you stuck?
Do you recycle habits that hurt your chance at love?
Are you attracted to a particular type that you fear your family and friends might not approve? Every-time you are in relationships, do you re-experience the same wounds and hurts? Do your relationships begin, develop, and end in strikingly similar ways?
Do you wonder if your marriage is still “worth it”?
Has it lost its sparkle and everything feels difficult? Do you two live like roommates, and you feel happier and lighter when alone, and dread spending time with your partner?
The Power of You!
When it comes to working on your relationship, remember the Serenity Prayer. Focus on what YOU can change, and start there. You will discover the power you have on changing your partner’s behavior, when YOURS shift.